Why Families Fight? The Main Causes for Family Conflicts and Possible Solutions

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Updated on September 9th, 2021

Everyone has conflicts inside of their family. It’s a pretty natural and common thing. But sometimes, serious conflicts can happen on a regular basis and make the lives of each member challenging.

If you are struggling with family conflicts and it doesn’t allow you to have a happy and fulfilling life, you have come to the right place. We will talk more about the nature of family conflicts and effective ways to solve them to make your family life happy.

Why Families Fight

In this article, you are going to find out the following:

  • why do family conflicts happen between family members?
  • what are the best ways to solve them?
  • how can online therapy help you improve your relationships?

Let’s get started right away to get valuable insights into family conflict resolution.

Main Reasons Family Relationships Might Turn Sour

Before we tackle the best strategies for resolving family conflicts, let’s better understand their main reasons. It can be very individual as you might be a newlywed couple or a big family who has been living together for a few decades.

However, these are the most common causes that lead to frequent disagreements:

  • you are a new couple who learn to live together;
  • you recently gave birth to a baby;
  • you have to fight for your personal boundaries;
  • jealousy and insecurity;
  • you have problems with home duties;
  • you lack communication;
  • you lack quality time together;
  • you have age or cultural differences;
  • you are going through separation or divorce;
  • you move to another city or country;
  • you have tough financial circumstances;
  • you have issues with your stepparents, stepchildren;
  • you have misunderstandings with your sibling.

Family conflict examples can be infinite, starting from a fight about the undo bed to more deep conflicts that are related to trust issues. Each person is unique and so are family relationships.

However, no matter what problems you are experiencing, it is possible to change the situation for the better. Down below. you will find some practical advice that will come in handy in case of a family conflict.

8 Effective Ways for Family Conflict Resolution

Now, let’s dig deeper and find out how to resolve conflict. By implementing these tips, you will achieve some tangible results and will improve your family relationship.

Think If the Problem Is Worth Conflict

Some people tend to overthink and overreact to certain situations. This is the nature that plays against them in case of family conflicts. Try to stop and think if the situation is really worth the conflict or if it’s just a minor inconvenience. We give a lot of our energy to everything we say or do so you have to rethink your attitude and spend your energy wisely.

Just ask yourself: “Is this situation something I want to give my energy and time to?”. If the answer is no, you better do something that brings you enjoyment and talk about it later.

Learn to Manage Your Emotions

Many people have problems with anger management. If you cannot control your emotions, it will be impossible to cope with a family conflict. It takes some time and effort but you definitely can work on emotion management skills.

Oleg Peliak, [09.09.21 15:18]
In case you have an argument and you cannot deal with the negativity and anger inside, get some personal space and count to 10. It will help you to calm down and it won’t let you do or say things that you will regret in the future.

Communicate and Listen

As you can see, one of the main reasons for family conflicts is poor communication between partners or family members. People simply don’t want either to talk or to hear each other. Just be open for a discussion, try not to interrupt, and listen carefully. After this, you will have a chance to do the same, speak openly, and be heard.

The main thing is to do it in a friendly and gentle manner with no negativity or aggression. The golden rule here is never to use you-statements and instead use I-statements only.

Just talk about your feelings and emotions and try to understand the feelings of your family. With enough empathy, you will look at the conflict differently and will be more ready for making a step towards each other.

Do All Your Best to Fix the Problem

Any kind of relationship is hard work. We all are so different and having arguments is OK but try to think of a possible solution that will help you minimize the conflict.

Look for a compromise, think about what outcome will be the most comfortable for you and your family members. Just be open for changes and you will succeed on your way to healthy and fulfilling relations inside of your family.

Don’t be afraid to take responsibility, initiate discussions, and make the first step to change. If you acknowledge the need for fixing the problem you will certainly come out with strategies that will help you get through this.

Learn to Forgive and Forget

In some cases, the best strategy is to simply let everything go. Maybe you hold too much inside and it’s time to get rid of everything that clutters your soul and mind. Forgiving people and forgetting their mistakes and wrongdoings is the most difficult and the most benign act.

Let go of all your negative feelings and find space for more positive vibes. Start with a clean slate and move on with your life. You are the one who chooses what you feel and how you react.

Take a Pause

If you feel that emotions overwhelm you and you cannot think rationally, take a pause. Some conflicts don’t require an instant solution. Therefore, the best strategy, in this case, will be to take a pause.

Give yourself time to cool down and think of what can be done to improve your relationship and solve the issue. After some time, you can get back to the problem and discuss it with your partner or family member while being cold-minded and open to criticism.

Try to React Positively

You can be in control over the situation and don’t let the conflict get aggravated. It takes a lot of time and practice, but eventually, you will be able to react in a different way.

In this case, meditation will be a great way for you to grow your calmness. Regular practice will help you find your inner peace and stay calm even in the most turbulent calm. Needless to say that meditation is beneficial for the overall physical and emotional health.

Minimize Contact

If you understand that your conflict is pretty grave and you cannot avoid fights, your main task will be to minimize contact with the person. Sometimes the best way to solve the issue is to simply cut off the communication.

You have to remember that your mental health and emotional well-being are the most important things that you have to take care of.

In order to maintain it, you have to set boundaries with toxic people that cause stress in your life. It can be challenging as you might think that it is your family/relative and there is no way you can cut them off. You have to always put yourself and your health first.

How Can Online Therapy Help?

The tips provided above will help you improve your family relationships and resolve conflicts more easily and painlessly.

Oleg Peliak, [09.09.21 15:18]
But it’s also recommended to get some professional help. Family issues require more effort and attention and qualified help will enable you to achieve progress faster.

Many people still believe that they cannot afford therapy or there is not enough time for them to have sessions. The good news is, modern technologies make it possible to have sessions no matter where you are.

So, there is no need to commute to the doctor’s office. Whether you are still at work, at home, or even on the go, you can have online sessions via your favorite device — smartphone, laptop, or tablet.

Online therapy is a completely safe space for you to share everything that you hold inside and everything that’s on your mind. All your personal information and communications with a therapist are highly confidential. So, you can be completely sure about your data security and privacy.

How Does Online Therapy Work?

Online sessions are as effective as regular face-to-face sessions and they get even more popular among busy adults. It is a great chance to connect with licensed professionals who have years of experience to help you solve all your problems.

There are 3 main therapy types that include text, audio, and video sessions. You get access to them depending on the subscription plan you choose and your preferences. It makes online therapy a convenient way to get professional support.

The price for online therapy services are more affordable. There are so many online therapy platforms, so you can choose the best-matching subscription and have access to experienced professionals who will guide you and your family on your way to healthy relationships.

A personalized plan developed by a therapist will help you work through all your troubles and find understanding in your family. You will learn how to communicate more effectively, be more loving, caring, and supportive and feel the same.

Bottom Line

Family arguing all the time is a challenge. Each member suffers from constant misunderstandings and conflicts. It negatively affects the emotional well-being of each one. We hope that this article sheds some light on how to cope with relationship issues.

Don’t hesitate to get professional help from licensed therapists. You can go through therapy on your own or choose family counseling that will enable you to solve arguments more effectively and straighten your relationships.

It’s the perfect time to take the first step towards harmony and healthy relationships in your family. Luckily, there are plenty of options that allow you to get professional guidance from a therapist. And you can find the online therapy and counseling platform you need reading our reviews.


For Elizabeth, mental health is a personal story. She is an author who provides innovative, creative, and engaging content on topics such as stress management, emotional wellness, relationships, etc. She enjoys creating a useful content to empower people and uses personal experience to help others on their journey to recovery.

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